“I get knocked down. But I get up again. You’re never gonna get me down.”
What do you do when life metaphorically knocks you down? (Or literally if that’s the case!)
When you are overwhelmed with Defeat/ Confusion/ Frustration/ Anger/ Hopelessness/ Resentment/ Bitterness? When the plans of God for your life you thought were just around the corner turn out to be a little farther in the future, if they happen at all? When you start to give up on the Promises God has given you because it doesn’t happen in your timeline or in the manner of your choosing?
How do you handle it? Where do you turn? Where do you go for truth? How do you cope? Do you stuff it all down and try to numb the pain with your vice of choice? Do you reach out to friends and family for help? Do you wallow in self-pity and sit in the victim circle for a bit? Do you busy yourself to distraction so that you don’t have to deal with it or process it? Or do you surrender all the dashed hopes and frustrations to the Lord?
I have been wrestling with this lately and I find it’s my natural inclination to harden my heart towards the Lord in these situations. Because I don’t feel I can trust Him with my one broken heart. I feel that I must guard it myself and wall it off from everyone, even Him, so that I don’t get hurt any further. And, I know logically this is counter-intuitive as only the Lord can guard my heart and hold it and keep it safe. But, alas, I have to go through the process of repenting and surrendering my heart back to Him all over again since He is the only one who can help me in my brokenness anyways. I certainly can’t do it on my own. For, I hide my heart from the One who knows it best and who can sustain, revive, and heal it!
The Lord has continuously told me that I am STEADFAST and that I am the GIFT OF HOPE. If these things are true, of course the Enemy will attack me here because these are my strengths that advance the Kingdom and he wants none of that. But, every time I come up against hopelessness or wanting to give up on God or myself, it is my chance to strengthen myself in the Lord so that He can refine me even more to become ever more steadfast and to brim over with hope. What the Enemy means for my harm the Lord always turns for good. Always.
This is one of my life verses:
“I have set the LORD continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.” Psalm 16:8
I am determined and I mean DETERMINED not to be shaken. So, when I go through periods of doubting the Lord and feeling that He’s abandoned me and is withholding good things from me, I have a choice. I can let this situation pull me away from the Father’s embrace or I can press into the hard and actually run towards Him even when I don’t feel I can trust Him because I know that I know that I know that He is good and He can be trusted with my heart. And that if His good promises to me still have yet to come to pass, that means they are even better than I could’ve imagined for myself and the wait will most certainly be worth it. And, I get to draw even closer to Him in the meantime because when I am hurting, I need Him more and our bond grows deeper. The Lord is so good. He wastes nothing, literally nothing.
So, in my disillusionment and grieving of dreams that are yet to be fulfilled and are running behind schedule (in my humble opinion), I have the opportunity to take my hurts to the Lord. He gently reminds me of His extravagant love for me and how He only has the Best for me. I must choose into renewing my mind and heart with truth from His whispers to me, from the Word, from friends who can speak life into me, and from previous prophecies I’ve received. I can let my feelings control me or I can be governed by the Spirit of Christ in me. I must declare things over myself that are true even when I don’t believe them so that I eventually do believe them. (Romans 12:2) So that this setback actually sets me up for success and becomes a launching pad into more hope/ joy/ peace/ strength/ faith. That the Enemy has to circle back because what was meant to derail me actually strengthened me to become more of myself and more like Christ than I was before and closer to my Father.
Easy to say all this but a lot harder to actually live it out. But, I’m learning. And I’m coming back to the Father sooner than in times past. Because, I’ve realized He’s my only Source of Life and Love and All the Things.
“Lord, to whom shall we go? You have words of eternal life.”
(John 6:68)
You are amazing in more than one way. I remember meeting you at the Dr. Office probably two years ago now and I haven’t met a dr who had so much compassion in so long. So from me to you. Thanks I really needed your kind words at that very moment.
THIS is where you inspire me! You are real and your tender heart is steadfast. How right you are that our lives are full of the choices we make and how they pave our daily roads…many times it’s difficult and difficulty feels like the pits! But the Lord hears our cries. “ I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears” Ps 34:4. He has spoken to me about “fear”… and it was not about being afraid of “stuff” that might happen, but being afraid of disappointment. He will not disappoint us. “Expectancy” is not the same as “expecting” an outcome ( that’s our own personal plan) …expectancy is full of hope! Have expectancy! Look toward the good things God has planned for you with bated breath!! They will come.
Love you and we continue to pray into your destiny with expectancy! Keep sowing your good seed. You are so precious!