Hi friends!
The Lord has been speaking to my heart lately about how I handle things or people that trigger me. He’s reminding me that every trigger (even the word triggers me, haha) is an opportunity to sit with Him and ask the hard questions of why that thing/ comment/ action upset me and what the root of the issue is in my heart. That instead of blaming and lashing out at the individual or group that triggered me, to realize it is a personal issue that I have ownership of and need to take responsibility for.
And, that is HARD. But we, as followers of Christ, are people who are unoffendable, who do not take offense. That is how God is and we are being ever more made into His likeness. So, if something offends or upsets me inordinately, then I have some heartwork to do. It is an invitation to sit with the Father and ask Him why I got so upset or defensive and ask Him to reveal the root of the matter and the truth of the matter about the issue at hand, my heart, and the person involved. It is a chance for healing and growth. But, we have the choice to take it or not. To sit in being offended and hurt or to do the hard thing and go after healing and stop projecting our hurt onto the other person.
And y’all, if we can get this, we can change the world. All of us innately seek to be seen and understood. It’s in our nature. But, if we are walking in fullness, secure in our identity in Christ, then we can worry less about being understood and more about seeking to understand others.
The spirit of division and offense is so heavy right now. And, we hold the key. When we are one with our Creator and get our worth from Him and know who and whose we are, it frees us up to love others with an open heart even when we disagree or they bring up our areas where we still need healing. We can choose into the process and see every encounter (negative or positive) as a summons back to the Father. To come to Him with our worries, fears, offenses, hurts and ask Him His perspective. And, the more time we spend with Him, the more we will act like Him in the moment of the heated interaction. We will actually become “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19) For we won’t seek validation from the other person or be dead set on being right, because we already are fully validated by Jesus.
Think of a trigger as a yellow light. It is a warning and an opportunity to slow down and sit with the Lord and renew your mind and receive healing of your heart. You can choose to slow down and commune with God about it or you can speed ahead, racing through the light, stuffing it down for the next time it gets brought to the surface. The Lord is very patient. He is not in a rush. He has healing available always but He lets us choose in. He wants to partner with us in the process for He’s all about relationship. He doesn’t go into areas of your heart that you’ve walled off without your permission, because He’s a gentleman. (There are exceptions to this, of course!)
So, next time you are upset by someone else, I invite you to pause. To ask yourself, is this about them or about me? Lord, what are you saying right now? What is the root of this anger/ frustration? Is there an action towards reconciliation with this person you want me to take? Do I need to seek counseling from a therapist or friend? What do you say about this?
And, watch what He does! This is most certainly easier than done but so beautiful if we actually walk it out. The healing, freedom, and transformation that is available at our fingertips is insane. Let us be people with whole hearts that choose into every opportunity for growth/ healing.
If anyone has any stories regarding this to share with me, I’d love to hear them!
Love you all dearly!
You are more powerful than you realize 🙂
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19-20
Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.
Proverbs 10:12
Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Proverbs 19:11
Hi Raina, I have to say my triggers are not so much anger or frustration but more so memories of a lost loved one. As the anniversary date comes close I notice I am more emotional and the emotions are buried deep for missing the loved one, however, I will pour those emotions into situations that have nothing to do with the loss. I have learned to be more conscious and acknowledge my emotions. I communicate that with those that I have interactions with even though a situation can cause me to be emotional, it’s triggering deeper emotions that causes me to be “a little extra” in expressing feeling sad, lonely, depressed etc. I very much do relate. It is because of my relationship with God that I am self aware and open hearted to work on knowing how to handle my triggers. Thank you for sharing and listening.