So, the Lord spoke to me in the bathroom during a church service this past December and I subsequently was filled with inexplicable gratitude for my hyperhidrosis disorder. Hyperhidrosis means you sweat excessively. I was just overcome with this sensation of gratitude and felt prompted to write a blog about it so now I am.
Just now, I went on a walk on this lovely 82? spring day and per usual, my armpits were wet within 5 minutes, feet squeaking loudly in my flip-flops, and I could smell myself by the end of it. No running, just leisurely walking, nothing to work up a sweat of this magnitude. I often am literally soaking wet by the end of an actual workout, as if I just jumped in a pool. But not as refreshing. And, I’m used to this. I’ve been wearing deodorant since I was 6 if that tells you anything.
I had surgery at age 18 to attempt to sever some of my sympathetic nerves to stop the sweating and it helped my hands but made everything else worse due to compensatory sweating. This condition necessitates no medication and is not life-threatening and miraculously I’ve never gotten dehydrated from it. It’s really very minor. But, it does affect my life and hamper it a bit.
Honestly, I’ve never been grateful for it before. It’s just a nuisance and embarrassing and gross and uncomfortable and restricts my wardrobe and shoes. Especially being a female, it’s definitely not lady-like, haha. As a kid, I couldn’t do the monkey bars or rock climb as my sweaty hands couldn’t grip. My writing would smudge on tests and it was hard to play clarinet for a recital due to nervous sweating. Creating a good first impression was hard as my hands were noticeably wet during the handshake. I would have big pit stains on shirts so I adapted my wardrobe to be primarily materials that dried quickly and wouldn’t show the sweat. Shoes would slip off so I had to have ones with straps. You get the picture.
So, I’m asking the Lord WHY ON EARTH I would thank Him for this disorder. I mean, really. Couldn’t you just cure me of it already so I don’t have to be freezing cold in the winter with a damp shirt that won’t dry because I got hot for 5 minutes in the car when the heat was blasting? Can’t I just wear a cotton shirt for once and not choose my shirts based on how easily I can hide the sweat?
He gently reminded me of the lessons I’ve learned through this “nuisance.” It’s taught me humility for sure as I can’t wear most trendy clothes and it’s embarrassing to be seen with sweat stains. Since it’s hard for me to wear the “in” attire, I have never really cared much about being fashionable and I don’t enjoy shopping so this helps me not to be overly materialistic in this area. It also helps me to realize my own weakness and need for the Lord. And, honestly, until He prompted this gratitude, I never even asked him to cure it. I didn’t even consider that an option. If western medicine had failed me, I figured I was stuck with it forever, my “cross to bear.”
So, now I feel Him prompting me to declare healing over myself in this area and believe that He can heal me and He will. And even if He doesn’t, He’s still good. I’m still good. So good. It’s just a minor thing but now I’m challenging myself to thank God for it and see it as a blessing and a reminder of His love. Every drop of sweat equates to more saturation in His love. And that, my friends, is something to be thankful for.
“If you wanna know how far my love can go
Just how deep
Just how wide
If you wanna see how much you mean to me
Look at my hands
Look at my side
If you could count the times I’d say you are forgiven
It’s more than the drops in the ocean, ooh ooh”
-Hawk Nelson-
